Some changes, we ache for.
For a red light to change,
for a season to change,
for a grade to change.
With others, we’re more reluctant:
A big move,
a new haircut,
a career change.
The thing is, if we spend so much time waiting for change, worrying about the next transition in life, are we really living?
While chatting with my family and neighbors today, my neighbor congratulated me on my new “graduate” status, and joked that she’s glad that she won’t have to read my “I can’t wait until I’m done with school” Facebook statuses anymore. Before I could reply, my mom chimed in with, “Well, now she misses school and is upset about not having a job yet” (I may or may not have had a slight emotional breakdown in the middle of dinner). My neighbor just nodded in understanding, saying, “I guess we’re never happy with where we are in life.”
That last sentence really makes me think. Are we ever really truly, 100% happy with what we have, or are we always thinking about what is going to happen next? We want things to change, but when they finally begin to change, we don’t want it anymore. And when I say “we”, I mean me (or, being grammatically correct, I).
For me, graduating from college is more difficult than graduating from high school. My future is wide open. I am no longer a child, but not quite a “grown up.” I am over-emotional; I am confused; I am nostalgic.
I don’t know exactly what it is that I am afraid of. Perhaps what I am most afraid of is the unknown. Although I can dream and think and plan as much as I want, I know that my future is not likely to turn out the way I think it will.
Because, if I was able to predict my future correctly, I would currently be on summer break from Purdue, getting ready to enter my last year of pharmacy school, and dating my high school boyfriend.
Although I can resist it as much as I want, it’s inevitable. Things change.
And it must be for the better. Right?
How do you deal with change?
Do you enjoy transitions in life?